Monday, November 23, 2009
I Am the Leaf But You Want the Vine
My wife is a very special woman. She has taught kindergarten in public school for 29 years. She has been at one school for her entire career which is almost unheard of in these times of over a 50% dropout rate among new teachers after 3 years on the job. Barb is nothing short of a deaconess (she would die if she knew I just typed that) at our church. She provides each Wednesday's meal for our "Dinner and a Devo." She ramrods many of our special events for our kids including our kid's Christmas Party and the Fall Festival. It also goes without saying that she gives our church a special gift each Christmas, our Church Christmas Party.
O.K., are you impressed with my wife. She is the epitome of being "sweet" if you will. Yet, this calm, loving, and gentle demeanor can be changed into a raging rampage at the sight of one (unfortunately not me) thing - Fall leaves!!
A couple of weeks ago we were in South Carolina for the Gator game. On our way home on Sunday and while still in S.C., my sweet / kindergarten teaching wife spotted some Fall leaves on some trees in the parking lot of a small strip mall. Being the dutiful husband, I pulled into the parking lot of the strip mall, just a bit nervous about "pulling leaves" off some one's tree. I figured that a few leaves shouldn't make any shop owner too mad if we were observed.
The trees were on a bit of a berm so I told my wife to stay back as I bounded up the "dangerously steep" berm to be hers and her Kindergarten class's hero. I delicately pulled about 4 different leaves off of one branch to give her class the full variety of colors that I could see. The reaction I received from my wife wasn't what I expected.
As I handed her the leaves she looked at me and said, "That's not nearly enough." Before I knew it, my sweet wife bounded up the same berm, grabbed an entire branch, and proceeded to tear off the entire branch off this tree. Before I could utter what I was ("Are you crazy / we're in stinking South Carolina and I'm unarmed!") thinking she came off the berm and shouted, "There's (as in complete branch) another!"
She sprinted across the parking lot before I could throw her in our Expo. I grabbed the down branch, threw it in our Expo, did my best "Starsky and Hutch" imitation as I burned rubber backing out of the parking space, drove over to where she was now dismembering another tree owned by this strip mall, jumped out of the still moving car, and said, "Baby, you're going to get us shot. Please get in the car."
She looked at me and said, "Silly goose, its only TWO branches." I love my wife but she's an animal around Fall Leaves. Zeesh!
O.K., are you impressed with my wife. She is the epitome of being "sweet" if you will. Yet, this calm, loving, and gentle demeanor can be changed into a raging rampage at the sight of one (unfortunately not me) thing - Fall leaves!!
A couple of weeks ago we were in South Carolina for the Gator game. On our way home on Sunday and while still in S.C., my sweet / kindergarten teaching wife spotted some Fall leaves on some trees in the parking lot of a small strip mall. Being the dutiful husband, I pulled into the parking lot of the strip mall, just a bit nervous about "pulling leaves" off some one's tree. I figured that a few leaves shouldn't make any shop owner too mad if we were observed.
The trees were on a bit of a berm so I told my wife to stay back as I bounded up the "dangerously steep" berm to be hers and her Kindergarten class's hero. I delicately pulled about 4 different leaves off of one branch to give her class the full variety of colors that I could see. The reaction I received from my wife wasn't what I expected.
As I handed her the leaves she looked at me and said, "That's not nearly enough." Before I knew it, my sweet wife bounded up the same berm, grabbed an entire branch, and proceeded to tear off the entire branch off this tree. Before I could utter what I was ("Are you crazy / we're in stinking South Carolina and I'm unarmed!") thinking she came off the berm and shouted, "There's (as in complete branch) another!"
She sprinted across the parking lot before I could throw her in our Expo. I grabbed the down branch, threw it in our Expo, did my best "Starsky and Hutch" imitation as I burned rubber backing out of the parking space, drove over to where she was now dismembering another tree owned by this strip mall, jumped out of the still moving car, and said, "Baby, you're going to get us shot. Please get in the car."
She looked at me and said, "Silly goose, its only TWO branches." I love my wife but she's an animal around Fall Leaves. Zeesh!
Comments:
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Greg - Now that's a thought.
Donna - As "Crocodile Dundee" said, "We could be mates." :)
Judy - It blew me away.
Donna - As "Crocodile Dundee" said, "We could be mates." :)
Judy - It blew me away.
It could be worse, Cecil. She COULD have that craving for diamonds in the windows of stores in the strip malls.
Then, you WOULD need arms to protect you on your fast get away from the scene of the crime!!
Lots of laughs here!
Dee
Then, you WOULD need arms to protect you on your fast get away from the scene of the crime!!
Lots of laughs here!
Dee
# posted by 
: 8:27 AM
: 8:27 AM
We had our Thanksgiving meal last night, since our son was here for week-end leave from boot-camp. Anyway, the table was very tastefully decorated with beautiful fall leaves, all collected 2 weeks ago by Wife who loves leaves too. However, she doesn't go crazy when she sees the colors.
jel - good to see you again.
Dee - Good point. I've been thinking of a way to weave Fall leaves into something that I can wear. :)
Brady - It could be that my wife is from West Virginia? :)
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Dee - Good point. I've been thinking of a way to weave Fall leaves into something that I can wear. :)
Brady - It could be that my wife is from West Virginia? :)
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